The Girl
My name is Alexis and I am a twenty one year old female originally from Gary, IN but I currenly live at Purdue Univeristy!! (Go Boilers!)
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Jay - Z - This Can't Be Life
...written on Monday, Nov. 15, 2004, @ 4:04 PM
Have you ever been so excited about something, and then all of a suddenly it isn’t so exciting anymore? That’s exactly how I feel about college. Before, I was complaining about how unchallenging and unfulfilling it was going to Historical Black Colleges and/or Universities; as a result, I was so excited about coming to Purdue. I was so excited about being at a much better campus, more positive intellectual people who were going to graduate one day from Purdue and to actually be something. Well, it’s been three months since this journey has begun for me, and it’s been nothing but stress. I have never felt so stupid before in my life. I have never doubted myself like I do now, and it’s so upsetting to see that I actually TRY to study for a test and still get grades like a 12/30, and people cheat and get grades like 22/30. I’ve never stayed up so late, and putting something like six hours into one homework assignment and still get something like a 3/10 points. I’ve gotten so frustrated with doing homework for statistics; it’s like what is even the point of doing it if I’m still going to get a low score. Do you know what my homecoming weekend consisted of? A football game, in which we lost, and then I came to my room to begin studying for a major COM 318 test, in which I got a 37/50; at least I did better than the mean which was a 35, however, a 37/50 is still a 74% - what a bummer! I haven’t gone out since the second or third week of school, and when I did, all I did was go crash at someone’s house and play spades with the female basketball team. Wow! No offense to them, but I have more fun sitting in my room laughing at my roommate and vice versa. Therefore, my weekends that I look so forward to, I go to the library with my roommate and sit there from 2PM until closing which is at 10PM, and on Sundays from 2PM until at least 9 or 10 PM. Do you know what I do for fun now? I find stalking pictures of Beyoncè to print out for free on the color jet printer to pin up on my wall. I have nearly forty of them now. Then, my roommate and I talk about how cute they are because they were not pre-arranged and we critique her wardrobe. Then, when Kay isn’t looking, I talk to the pictures (sometimes she catches me) but it’s a reliever. I guess, you can say this isn’t the most successful school year for me because I don’t have many friends and my grades are not the bomb, as a result I feel like the ultimate idiot of all time. Now I know what my mom was talking about when she spoke of the cheaters who programmed their calculators to do well. I just wish it was someway they could be caught in the act so they wouldn’t be praised for their cheating, and I wouldn’t be scolded for being honest.
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